This evening I was wondering, looking at the huge rocks along the coastal belt
" how the hell did they bring them here ? "
With rex we had another major concern to discuss since D had confused us toppled our mindset upside down.The feeling of wretchedness still haunting inside my mind orders me to sleep,but I have slept enough !
Exactly a year ago I was so fond of writing ,browsing the pages of facebook and chatting he's and she's all around the globe - Skype, MSN . Gtalk , Yahoo - what didn't I use ? lol It was not a hobby but a search for something that I thought I missed in my life.Then suddenly it all stopped like I had found what I had searched for...For a moment though I thought that I had found what I have searched so far and it was within my reach.A year along i was striving hard to gain what I longed and today with my old pal , on a train coach , sitting besides a window , looking at the lazy sea I'm repenting for what I have done.It was a mirage all the way along , something that never ends , something that never satisfies and something that i understood wrong.DM when he used to teach me told us
" you better make the most of your twenties , where you can learn anything and everything, earn the hell out of you in the thirties and save the resting part for the late fourties "
anyway I had just wasted almost two years of my golden twenties.I had done many things and helped many people , earned something for life , but....
Today I decided to restart, like many more times before I hope this will not end in a dead end.I used to write for my joy , reading what I write gave me immense pleasure and some rythmless poems too.Some I wrote for some special people ,some i wrote for my self but in the end it was all literature for me.Maybe D is right after all , we do need something to carry with us, but both rex and I know coding wont help us to be what we desire in any way.It will just make us slaves of our own cell of limitations but I do want and will start with a program that will work.hmm .. they say " Love is Blind " , but trying to love I saw many things , that i will never leave or forget ever , so Its time to restart.This may just be a restart of the machine , restart of the cycle or a restart of my life hopefully ,but still in this constantly changing world "change " is the only thing that counts and It will always keep me smiling...
